Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Nurse!
Nurse who?
Nurse sense talking to you!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Oates!
Oates who?
Oates’ay can you see!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Ocelot!
Ocelot who?
Ocelot of questions don’t you!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Odette!
Odette who?
Odette’s a bad sign!
Knock Knock
Who’s there?
Odessa!
Odessa who?
Odessa hot one!
The Top 10 Things To Check The Salad Bar Before You Load Your Plate Up
Anything that’s moving.
Green Carrots.
Moldy Croutons.
Body parts.
Blood in the French Dressing.
A cucumber slice with a bite out of it.
I’ve seen the movie…they could be there so watch out for Killer Tomatoes!!!
Lettuce that closely resembles Astroturf.
How should I put this…let’s just that the sneeze guard didn’t do its job and there’s something phlegm related in the radishes.
The body of Harold, the dim-witted drive thru clerk who kept messing up orders, under the ice on the bar.
Two morons stand on a cliff with their arms outstretched. One has some budgies lined up on each arm, the other has parrots lined up on his arms.
After a couple of minutes, they both leap off the cliff and fall to the ground.
Laying next to each other in intensive care at the hospital, one moron says to the other, “I don’t think much of this budgie jumping.”
The other moron replies, “Yeah, I’m not too keen on this paragliding either.”
A man was speeding down a Alabama highway, feeling secure in a gaggle of cars all traveling at the same speed. However, as they passed a speed trap, he got nailed with an infrared speed detector and was pulled over.
The officer handed him the citation, received his signature and was about to walk away when the man asked, “Officer, I know I was speeding, but I don’t think it’s fair - there were plenty of other cars around me who were going just as fast, so why did I get the ticket?”
“Ever go a fishin’?” the policeman suddenly asked the man.
“Ummm, yeah…” the startled man replied.
The officer grinned and added, “Did you ever catch ‘em all?”
Where do ants go to eat?
At a restaurant!
What do you call an ant with five pairs of eyes?
Antteneye!
What do you call an and with frogs legs?
An antphibian!
What kind of ants are very learned?
Pedants!
What do you call a smart ant?
Elegant!
What do you call an ant who can’t play the piano?
Discordant!
What kind of ant is good at maths?
An accountant!
How come if ants are always so busy they always get time to show up at picnics?
How many ants are needed to fill an apartment?
Ten ants!