(Annoying radio announcer’s voice:) Congratulations! You have reached 555-1234, perhaps one of the most obnoxious answering machine messages in the greater Seattle area! If you don’t know who you are dialing, HA! If you DO know who you are dialing, you were probably expecting something like this!
A vampire joke
Why did the vampire have fang decay?
He was always eating fangcy cakes!
A ghost joke
Where do Australian ghosts go on holiday?
Lake Eerie!
A vampire joke
Why did the vampire take up acting?
It was in his blood!
A ghost joke
What is a ghost’s favourite desert?
Knickerbocker ghouly!
A vampire joke
What is a vampire’s favourite fruit?
A neck-tarine!
A cannibal joke
Why won’t cannibals eat Frank Sinatra?
Because he’s always coming back!
A vampire joke
What is the American national day for vampires?
Fangsgiving day!
Thistles may not grow in one’s yard.
Baltimore
No person who is a “tramp” or “vagrant” shall loiter in any park at any time. They define tramp as a person who roves for begging purposes and a vagrant as an idle person who is able-bodied living without labor. It’s a $50 fine. I guess the tramp would have to beg for the money to pay the fine. -Park Rule 6
Looking for more dumb laws? Check out DumbLaws.com!
It’s illegal to take a lion to the movies.
It’s illegal to throw bales of hay from a second-story window within the city limits.
It is a violation of city code to sell chicks or ducklings to a minor within 1 week of the Easter holiday.
It is a park rule violation to be in a public park with a sleeveless shirt. $10 fine. This would include joggers that go shirtless. (1898)
Baltimore City
You may not curse inside the city limits.
Though you may spit on a city roadway, spitting on city sidewalks is prohibited.
Columbia
Though clotheslines are banned, clothes may be draped over a fence.
You can not have a antenna exposed outside of your house yet you can have a 25′ satellite dish.
Ocean City
Eating while swimming in the ocean is prohibited.
A law from the early 1900’s prohibits men from going topless on the Boardwalk. (Repealed)
The checkout line at the hardware store was getting longer and longer as the clerk labored to get the new cash register to cooperate.
At one point she wailed “Oh no, NOW what do I do ? It just rang up sixty-four thousand, five hundered seventy four dollars in sales tax on a ten-dollar sale !”
Suprisingly, the customers in front of me didn’t seem too upset by the delay.
Some even chuckled sympathetically. It wasn’t until I got near the front of the line that I saw the neatly hand-lettered sign in front of the register: WE ARE CURRENTLY DOING BATTLE WITH OUR NEW COMPUTER FOR CONTROL OF THE STORE—WE APPRECIATE YOUR PATIENCE.
Two lawyers met at a cocktail party late one night.
“How